Men are Dicks

I believed in him.
I believed every word he told me.
I believed that there was something.
I wanted love and I felt loved.

We have fun
I get no sleep
Sleep in class, miss notes, fail exams
I took a chance. Wanted love and felt it.

Cans turn to bottles
Bottles turn into parties
Bottle turns into cup at the bar or gig
One turns into many

Then out of the blue its all taken away from me.
I start analyzing what happened, what if, was it me, was it my fault.
Want to say goodbye. Coffee

One more chance I say, just one.
You have x amount of time to clean up.

Don't make it that far.
We part ways.
He still parades around me
His stupid friends thinks its all a game
Its all torture, I have society to live in

Get a message not intended for me and find out there's another
He's moved on, my nightmares have just begun.
I spiral out of control.
Unable to stop myself
End up lying

They break up
We are back together, unofficially

Time is awesome.
I want love, I feel loved.
My head is sayin keep your guard up
My heart says go for it, you only live once
Things are alright
He wants to live together, and has wanted to since the very beginning
Find out my best friend is a two faced bitch
Find out alot of other information
I walk out
I get crushed yet again.
Want to be taken back to be reconsidered. Beg and Plead to him

Love my friends to death.
I cry, I stuff my face, I go to gym, I read a book or two and I'm starting back on my own two feet.
Awesome

I get a call one night, get suckered in and next thing I know I'm in limbo torturing myself.
Knew it was wrong but couldn't help myself
Drunk and sleepless
Told me there was and is a future
I wanted to believe him
Visit him every once in a blue moon

Was proud of some of his choices to be a better man
I sit in wonderment
Told me he was doing it all for me
I believed him
Torture myself by reading up on him
Torture myself into what he wrote about
Find out there's someone else
I'm crushed

I want something I can't have.
I want to have that possession over him that he's mine

Figure out that he's a bastard
Always was always will be.
Nothing has changed and nothing will
Getting tired of his writings on me, they are reminder of why I shouldn't ask for him back
Getting tired of being the only one doing anything
Looking into myself and finding a better person
Looking for Mr. Right or Career with nice Salary

--tortured with hatred and crushed by love--